Take, for instance, the beautiful woman that has been dumped several times and has now landed a man that has everything she has ever hoped for. She thanks God for blessing her yet she has some misgivings because of the many times when she thought she was in a committed relationship only to find her intended with someone else or has been cheating on her for months. This time, with this new man she orchestrates to seal the deal with a pregnancy. There, now he's not going anywhere because he has an heir to all of the money and he will love her forever for giving him a legacy to carry out the family name. We turn the page and it says, "...and they lived happily ever after." That's the cue for the proverbial sigh thinking, this is how life should be. Once putting the story book away, we have to open our eyes and really deal with ALL that life offers.
I created that scenario because I am trying to understanding why those calling themselves Christians aren't getting it (Hosea 4:6 AMP). The next generation should be more advanced then mine. It took me awhile before I understood what God intended for His children and even now I find new things and wish that I knew them way back when. I teach others so they won't have any regrets and those tell the younger and so forth and so on (Titus 2:3-5 AMP). Yet, I see some come back with children and no marriage, addictions and no education, returning to the church with no joy, and so forth and so on (2 Timothy 3:1-7 AMP). Do we all need a refreshers course on the prodigal son? Shall we really go back to the milk of the Word (Hebrews 5:11-13 AMP)? What's going on? Does the world have something different that has not been offered centuries ago? Friends of the world are still enemies to God - right (James 4:4 AMP)?
The scenario described earlier, I thought about when seeing a woman who had a relationship with an athlete that didn't work. She no longer allowed herself to cool off from what she had been through before hooking up with another athlete and getting pregnant by him. Why would she think that just because he fathered a child, she will have security? She wasn't with him along the way in order for him to become what he is. She was a means for him to relieve himself; much like a toilet. Just because he pays child support, which will be the actual long term relationship, doesn't mean all will be well. After a certain age, child support is over! Is he considered a good father? Is she a good mother? Or is it selfish from both aspects of the spectrum? That child will have a hard road to travel because neither parent is thinking of this child's emotional, psychological, or physiological, well being.
From the Christian perspective, how did Ishmael and Hagar come out (Genesis 21:9-17 AMP)? Was Abraham hounded for years? Did Ismael get a portion of the inheritance? Did Hagar become the head mistress and do away with Sarah? No, Ishmael and Hagar were sent out of the camp to fend for themselves. Now look at this spiritually, if Hagar was given the money to raise her child, would Ismael be satisfied? Would he be blessed? Or would he still be in the dessert searching for identification?
A woman that tries to trap a man with a child is only heaping more baggage on herself then she can carry. First of all, her thinking is in need of solitude, soul searching, and/or refuge in Christ. Be satisfied with your own company. Find a project that will discipline your mind into doing something that is more constructive for you and possibly for someone else. Involve yourself in a volunteer program. Teach younger girls to be ladies. Get involved in a soup kitchen. Crochet or knit blankets for orphaned babies in a hospital. Do something that takes your mind off of yourself. Second, join a group where you can be held accountable. What I mean, if you aren't there, people will miss you. Something like a yoga class, bible study, a meeting with a group of people with like interests (more then 2 people). Third, reflect on those things you have learned or have taught someone else on a weekly basis. After a year, see where you have come as opposed to where you could have been (2 Timothy 3:15-17 AMP). These practices are cleaning the spots and wrinkles you have been wearing on the garment that only God can see (Ephesians 5:25-30 AMP).
Babies in Christ can't do these sorts of practices because they are more concerned about themselves and what people think of them. Babies cry for more and are never quite satisfied with anything. They want more clothes, better cars, more trinkets and much more money. The crying is incessantly and will soon find that they are all alone because no one wishes to hear those cries all of the time. Babies get angry when no one is listening and have tantrums; yet even that gets old. When babies decide to have a baby...well, it should be a crime. But when it keeps happening and no one says anything, it soon becomes the norm.