There is an irritating ignorance that seems to try and lurk arround explaining how normal it is to struggle when first getting married. I suppose if you stand on the principles of the world, then you can bandwagon down that journey of bumps, jagged edges, and hardships. Personally, I choose to follow Jesus.
The funny thing is when choosing to follow our Lord and Savior, we are all in agreement within the confines of the church building (right?); however, when using the same MO (modus operandi) for life in solving the equations the world dishes out, some tried to resurrect that which has passed away (2 Corinthians 5:17 AMP).
It is considered to be natural to have struggles and concerns when newly married. Reason being, because of having to cope with another personality, the differences of opinion with daily tasks (being raised in two different households), and the presumption the other will change in a given period of time (2 Corinthians 6:14 KJV). This makes sense; yet, with the belief system that the old has passed away and all things have become anew it is of no use to the discipline follower of Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17 KJV).
In following Jesus, one of the things practiced is walking in the Spirit so not to fulfill the lust of the flesh (Galatians 5:16-17 KJV). In walking in the Spirit, our once blind eyes have a better understanding. We use love in everything done and with constant practice of both of these principles comes maturation, promotion, and reward. For some, it is getting the better position on a job, others will receive financial compensation for past troubles, and the faithful few will receive the spouse that was requested and had patiently waited for (James 1:4 KJV).
You see, because of the Holy Spirit and the practice of the walk, both individuals making their requests known to God would have been diligent in obedience. Because of that diligence, God blessed them and in so doing, continually keeping the relationship with Him, they have become more like Him (more like God). When God then makes the presentation of her to him, he is pleased because of her diligent walk with Him. She is pleased because she can recognize the One she kept a relationship with in him. This is then continued when the two become one. There is no one getting to know an unknown personality because it is the same as yours which is His (God). No struggle because of the constant agreement. No hardships because the plan had already been carried out before the marriage. When the two become one there is a strengthening of that same plan. One will put a thousand to flight...remember?
Now wrestling is different. I personally find the sport of wrestling, disgusting. I saw the high school wrestling teams before in their little flimsy outfits trying to get their opponent out of the circle and/or pin his shoulders back in one hold or another. They are sweating all over the other one with an armpit in the other's face or the head in the butt of the other guy - ick! If I ever found myself in such a position, I would immediately break all of the rules. Sweat dripping? Armpit hair? My hair locked between someone's thighs? Pinning shoulders to a mat would be the least of his troubles. Nevertheless, in the Spirit, wrestling is expected in a Christian's life - no doubt, no argument here. However, the wrestling is a task that is not necessarily on going and actually I don't expect it in a marriage not unless each individual (notice the separation of the twain in that description) comes with their own emotional baggage. That sounds like the natural lingo again.
First, let's get beyond this natural stuff - or didn't we already do that by walking in the Spirit so not to fulfill the lust of the flesh (Galatians 5:16 KJV)? So why wouldn't our language be faith filled rather than tickling our own ears with natural lingo - worldly principles? Tighten the slack on casual talk (another blog entirely). We don't have to speak Elizabethan, but we do have to speak that which is pleasing to God. With that in mind, do you see how wrestling is a means for the Christian still trying to gain maturity in the things of God? Recall what Jesus said we could have if we sought the Kingdom Life (Matthew 6:33 KJV). Now, study righteousness. You will see that the wrestling that you have accepted is only required based on what you have just learned and recently applied.
I could write it here but it would be like me serving food that you cannot recognize as being nourishing. I recall the 23rd Psalm where the Lord prepared a table in the presence of mine enemies. I asked God in prayer over and over again, why? Why would He have me to eat in the presence of my enemies? Would they be flesh and blood? The Word says, no (Ephesians 6:12 KJV). Would they be at the ready to take my plate and food from me? The Word says, its possible (Luke 11:21-23 KJV). Would they be able to defeat me? The Word says if I allow them place (Ephesians 4:27 KJV). So how do I rid myself from them to have the peaceful, abundant life that has been promised to me? The Word tells us that too (Joshua 1:7-9 KJV)!
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