Tuesday, May 3, 2011


High School Economics teaches that because there is a demand there should be an increase in supply. If there is no demand, why then produce what no one desires to have? Once the desire is targeted, then marketing proceeds in order for that market to be capitalized on. Marketing is seemingly a strategy that is monopolized by the economic industry. This would not necessarily be true. People have taken a page out of the our high school textbooks and have used the same strategy in every aspect of their lives; however, for the purpose of this blog, I will focus on Christian dating.

In my early twenties, married, and pregnant with twins, I was shopping in a grocery store with my sons' soon to be godmother and family friend. We happened upon a woman looking to be in her late forties shopping as well. I didn't know her but the family friend did. She introduced me and for the short time there in the market place we conversed. The way she and my friend spoke it was as if she had just divorced or her husband had passed away. I couldn't tell because the verbiage seems the same no matter what the incident. For instance:
How are you doing gurl (looking sad and patting the person on the back for some sort of sympathetic support)? Is there anything I can do for you? You are going to be alright...if you need anything at all.

The reply didn't reveal any more information then I already had:
Don't worry I am fine. I moped for a little while but I know life goes on. I know I had to shake it off and keep myself marketable.

It was that last statement that I remembered and thought how wise for her to say such a thing. How does a woman keep herself marketable in a market place where most of the men her age are either married, have committed to a life style of being a bachelor, or in the grave? I am speaking of Christian men. Adding the secular genre is not considered here. I contemplated over what this woman said for quite some time wondering if I would ever have to make the same decision she did and do whatever that decision entailed.

Working in a senior community I have watched the ladies the most and how they handle themselves in every given situation. Do they resort to old ways or do they try out their senior status in having everyone change because they are the age that they are. For the most part they rely on being seniors and like the benefits that it brings; however, I couldn't help over hearing a woman who is 101 in age. She was standing at the dinner counter looking over the dishes that were being served. The kitchen staff waited patiently as she decided what she was going to have. She said in a small voice, "I have to watch my figure." The kitchen staff chuckled knowing her age. I looked at her tiny face as she deliberated over the choices of entrĂ©es. She was serious.

The office manager was invited to an event that was being held at my place of employment. She invited her mother-in-law of whom she was caring for. While leaving to go to the event with her mother-in-law who was dressed in her after five attire along with her date, the office manager whispered to me, "She is 95. My father passed away 10 years ago and she has a boyfriend." The office manager didn't have a date nor the prospects of anyone interested. She looked at me astonished having known this all of this time and I suppose it bothered her a little; nevertheless, her mother in law looked good to be 95 years old.

As a care giver for a 93 year old woman, I did for her everything she could not do. She had her usual breakfast and watched her usual programs. For the most part she was home bound and her daughter preferred it that way. When I saw that she was getting bored with the usual breakfast I would cook for her, I changed it up a little. Instead of the one egg, a couple of strips of bacon with grits and toast every morning, I gave her along with the egg and bacon, one pancake. She enjoyed that pancake as if she hadn't eaten for awhile. I let her daughter know of the progress and the tiny change I made in her diet for one day. The daughter went ballistic. On and on I heard her drone about how fattening pancakes are and how I could ask anyone for that information which was not necessary. I figured if she was going to get upset it would be because any side effects it would have with her medication and her health was at risk. But then I thought - over a pancake! I had to listen to this woman go on and on how that one pancake was going to make her mother fat. She was 93! She was home bound! One pancake was going to set the scale on tilt - really? That woman was so happy to get that pancake. For goodness sake, let her live a little or did her daughter have the same idea as those women mentioned above? Even in taking care of her mother, was she thinking to stay in good shape just in case there are prospects near by?

Where am I going with this in the way of Christian dating? Isn't it obvious? For women, we may not be the ones to go and do the finding but we are the ones that will be making the assessments on whether the potential on looker is what God intended for you to help. Seeing the Word tells us that man looks at the outward appearance and as much as we would like for the faith walk to go further then what we have been taught, we still have to make this body holy and acceptable (Romans 12:1 KJV). If the animals are looking at appearance and strong scents before mating, what do you suppose God was looking at when He said it was good and for man not to be alone? Many women when they pass a certain age, we tend to think that there is a point of no return and we might as well let gravity have its way. Personally, along with other scriptures that I meditate on, one of my favorites is for the Lord to fill my mouth with good things and renew my youth like the eagles. I still fight the good fight of faith - even with gravity!

For the men, marketing for you would be much like what I believe God was looking at. Even when He provided Adam a job, a vision for the future, and a place to reside, Adam still needed the help of a woman. Note how God made sure all of those other matters were already in place. Also pause and look at the animals as I believe God did before forming man (Genesis 18-22 KJV). There the lion, walrus, kangaroo, elephant, some species of birds, and so many other males of the animal kingdom - they stake out their territory, they look around for the best female of the group, and they keep watch for any predators or other males trying to take what is theirs. This is what animals do! ANIMALS! Selah.

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