Thursday, December 31, 2009

Be a Son, Then a Man, Before Being a Husband

My mother use to say, "a son is a son until he gets a wife; but a daughter is a daughter all of her life." Though it may have not meant much to my brother, it put enormous pressure on my sisters and myself wondering what we had to face later on. It wasn't unitl I became an adult and found hidden truths in the Word of God that delivered me from my mother's limmrick.

The generation before me worried about their golden years and the future that social security had for their children. We know that in Christ, we are already provided for (Philippians 4:19 AMP); therefore, those concerns can be casted over on Him (1 Peter 5:7 AMP) and we can resume to enjoy the promises again. However, for men, the knowledge and understanding to do that which has been uncommonly weighed upon women should be agiven. Men should not have pressure to be resonsible and stand to provide for their families. It use to be a regular practice. What's happened over these last decades that changed that?

In scriptures, the New Testament to be exact, men wouldn't allow the women to speak believing that women were the reason man fell in the first place. Not only Adam and Eve was depicted but also Sarai's reasoning with Abram which birthed Ishmael (Genesis 16:1-15 KJV). Bathsheba's infidelity with David which birthed a dead son and the insanity of Job's wife when she lost her first lot of children. These accounts would solidify beliefs in men that the women have been their downfall for hundreds of years; only if man would be what God gave him the authority to be, the outcome surely would have been different.

The Word tells us that man is the head of his wife. The woman was made for man (1 Corinthians 11:9 KJV). Because Adam and Eve and what was stated above, should he ever listen to her? The truth is in the Word. It doesn't contradict itself, it is all about what you choose to believe. If God tells us that he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord (Proverbs 18:22 KJV), do you believe then that she is in the home being mute, only there for maid service, and marital duties then the favor can be obtained; having had accolades and praise for all she had done prior to even knowing you? Certainly not.

The problems that arose with man were not only that he listened to his wife but that he was disobedient to God. God gave instruction to Adam, Abram, and Job. Adam chose to eat the fruit. Abram chose to lie with Hagar. Job chose to sacrifice for unspoken sins. None of these decisions had anything to do with life and its benefits. How then can the woman take all of the blame?

When David danced in the streets praising God to the point of dancing out of his clothes, Michal, his wife, watched from the window and was embarrassed. She decided, once David came in, to reprimand him for not acting more like a king with some sort of decorum. What did David do? Cover himself after listening to those vile words spoken to him? Certainly not. He told Michal, in as much, for her never to speak to him in this manner again. After all that God has done including sparing her life, how dare she? David made a decision. He chose life and reaped the benefits. Michal was barren and quite honestly wasn't written about in he scriptures anymore. Not even when she died, was it recorded.

The truth is, a man must be aquainted with God and how He does what He does. It requires living a righteous, holy life. Then this son of God can seek a wife, if it is his desire to have one. He seeks a wife in a manner God tells him, having his steps ordered, having sought the Kingdom and His righteousness, and with listening ears. As much as one may enjoy the attractiveness at what he sees, what he sees may not be a wife material and therefore favor cannot be obtained. It is more than just seeing. He must hear what she says in order for him to know that with the information already adhered to from God, what he hears from the right woman will match thereby being equally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14 KJV).

If the son of God can listen to this woman, then why why wouldn't he listen to her after the wedding ceremony? The Word tells us to submit to her husband and also continues for us to each other (Ephesians 5:21-22 KJV). Should the verse be over looked? Women have much to contribute in a marriage besides sex and maid service. If a man prohibits her from using the gifts God has given, would he be quenching the Holy Spirit (1 Thessalonians 5:18-20 KJV)? How important  is it for man to stay in the favor of God? You choose.

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