Monday, March 22, 2010


Have we lost sight of the reason 2 people join to marry? Is it for the children born out of wedlock? Is it to please the parents who have waited long enough for their children to get it together and settle down? Is it just for peace of mind so not to stress about the proverbial biological clock or because everyone else is doing it.

For all of the those other reasons, what will the overall outcome be? How bright will the future look without all that God says you should have first? I know of someone who has expressed anger at the long wait to be married (1 Thessalonians 5:18 AMP). This isn't new. Who else just gave in and went down the aisle anyway? How many people live in regret today?

It is what I think about that helps with any oppressive thought the enemy tries to tempt me with (1 Corinthians 10:13 NIV). Of course I use the Word and having a better understanding of what to apply it to is the added help. If the thought isn't cast down to the obedience of Christ, one will act inappropriately by taking that walk down the aisle to vow in a manner that will lead to regret.

I was recently speaking to someone close to me who expressed this very topic. The wait she has done came to a head and she sounded as if her faith was being tested. She was told prophetically that she would be marrying in a certain alottment of time. So she waited (and then some). When the prophecy didn't happen, she started to express resentment with the process. I asked her some questions but she fed the resentment too long and wasn't interested with what I was trying to convey.

The process isn't usually comfortable. Its purpose is to give both parties the time to re-evaluate the belief system from when you were babes in Christ as opposed to sons of God (1 Corinthians 13:11 KJV). Is the thinking the same? Have you done anything drastic to improve on yourself? What has changed? Do you see situations as you use to? Can you use the Word more rather than your feelings and/or opinions? Do you still believe sexual compatibility is more important than the matters of the heart  where God sees you?

If a woman is made for the man then why haven't you done what what God said in order to be prepared (1 Corithians 11:12 AMP)? Do you (woman) walk in love in all that you do (Matthew 22:37:40 KJV)? Have you the joy and peace of Kingdom Living (Romans 14:17 KJV)? Are you holy? If the Word says that man should love his wife as Christ loves the church who gave His life for her, have you (man) practiced that kind of love (Ephesians 5:25 KJV)? If you haven't where is it going to come from? It doesn't magically appear because you had a ceremony in a church.

I saw a couple on TLC's Whose Wedding Is It Anyway? They had known each other for some time and had a child together. In deciding to marry, they could not agree on the type of wedding . She liked the Traditional kind; he liked African ceremonial. Neither would compromise so they competed for getting the wedding of their dreams. It was supposed to be entertaining but all I could think of is, they shouldn't get married. I had to turn the program off. Competition is opposing the other. The outcome of those games will be photographed to recall the resentment over and over for the one who lost.

The bottom line is, God knows what He is doing. He will not match righteousness with evil (2 Corinthians 6:14 KJV). Pity parties and joyfilled days don't go together. Night and day are separated for a reason. Faith and patience are together for a reason (Hebrew 6:12 KJV). You are still single for a reason. She may not be ready for you. He might have some things he has to complete before embarking on that responsibility. So don't rush it (Philippians 4:6 NIV)!

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