Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Repulsed

I had written about my son's godmother before. She has since gone home to be with the Lord. She was an elderly woman who loved the Lord and usually stayed to herself. When asked she had wonderful words of Wisdom and was a wealth of information yet she was prudent with whom she shared her information with (Proverbs 8:12 KJV). At the same time that my now ex-husband and I chose this woman to be our son's godmother, we also selected an elderly man who was one of the elders in the church. He had never been married and stated many times that he wasn't interested in marriage. Oh, by the way, my son's godmother was a widow. Without mentioning it, we thought it was a good selection and if there happened to be a spark between the two of them, well so be it.

How odd when she asked who we chose for the godfather that she would look repulsed at the sound of his name. Had he done something to her or said something distasteful? I just caught it at the corner of my eye. She saw me. I didn't ask her and she would  have never divulged what she was feeling at the sound of his name. It wasn't too many weeks after the christening of my son, did his godfather announce that he was now ready to be married. I had forgotten all about her expression from before and was elated that the elder came to his senses. We, my ex and myself, along with the congregation knew who the woman of his desires would be (actually there were no other women compatible to his age in the ministry). We all smiled at her. Her expression was stoic - at the least.

There is this man at my place of employment. He resides in the building and has been single his entire life. He receives a pension now; which is indicative of what his age could be. He usually doesn't talk much but when he does, its to argue some arbitrary point that no one else is interested in. He has told a number of other people in the community that he was once a lawyer but personally aside from the arguing, I just don't see that. He has made it known to one or two elderly women that he is still interested in sex but he doesn't have much to comment about when it comes to marriage. Each day he wore the same shirt and kakhi pants with either flip flops or Birkenstocks. He allowed his jet black hair to become unruly and smoothed it out of his face when needed and his white goatee grew to his chest. He eats his meals alone and burps in public. If has to scratch, he just does it. And if there is that occasional boogar that needs to be removed at any given point, well it just has to be taken care of at that moment right there. Before revealing all of these disgusting habits, he decided to speak to me about faith. Him being Jewish, I found his views interesting though many were incorrect by the standards of the Word. It wasn't long before he was finding reasons to stay away from me and even creating a public situation where we would have to argue and he would have reason not to speak to me any further. I suppose he had to and I didn't have a problem with it.

It was about 10 months (or so) later that I saw this man get a haircut and a shave. He was burning music to a CD and trying to learn the lyrics to specific songs. He bought new shirts and pants and began looking like he might have had an education as a lawyer. He still didn't speak to many people but his disposition improved vastly. The obvious conclusion would be that he finally has met someone. Well, let's go with that for a moment.

What if he met someone like the single godparents of my son? What would be so wrong for these men to finally seeing the light of day and realizing what God said is true, "it isn't good for man to be alone?" It is what that kind elderly woman saw that so many younger women don't see and go down the aisle anyway. She didn't see the love of God in him. How selfish is a man to live his entire life as he sees fit and then when he can't do what he use to because of health, age, fitness, or realizing that he will be alone, then those final last few breathes of air should be left for someone to care for him. That isn't loving her as Christ loves the church! That's loving himself all the way to the grave. That repulsion that she did is the expression single women of God she all do when she is convince that he is courting her because he is tired of taking care of himself. These men waited and are elderly but the new generation has this idea early. Where are the men to teach them differently?

Which comes to the momentary difference. The change that the Jewish man could have had. I don't mean to write and be jaded against all men who have decided to wait and be watchful with whom to spend the rest of their life with. Because the change that can come over men who have struggled to be men can come and continually be taught through a means that would confound the wise (1 Corinthians 1:27 KJV). God, by which man was created is a father to the fatherless (Psalm 68:4-6 KJV) and can teach better that any mere mortal could. He is the same today, yesterday, and forever. His ways are higher than ours. Those higher ways would then be better. Of course a change can come over people for the better. We hope for those changes. It is what we have prayed for with many of our family members. It is the only kind of change that is genuine, sincere, and lasting.

When a man suddenly changes (without the assistance of God) after he has annoyed so many people with his lack of hygiene, manners, and arrogance in speech, it is because he knew what he was doing all along and chose to continue with that behavior. He then has an epiphany about himself and then becomes the rational human being that society welcomes. He is perpetrating for his own purposes. A woman that is fooled by his con game will see the light after the vows have been spoken. It is why we see men marrying women who are younger and younger. The younger ones can be fooled easier. The repulsion is a clear indication of not only wisdom making herself known without words but God showing those things that He hates.

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