Thursday, December 22, 2011

Playing The Innocent Game

Remember when you were a child or you can recall the cuteness of children? It was mostly because of those big eyes trying to absorb all of  the different things life has to offer. Everything is fresh and new and the simplest of things that we take for granted, seeing how a child sees it for the first time, we can't help but to smile. Smile? We take pictures and videos to capture the memories, show them when they are older just to be entertained and sometimes grieve of the innocence lost. ABC's America's Funniest Videos are as successful as they are because of our desire to capture those precious and sometimes hilarious moments.

The hilarity ceases when the child realizes that adults have a soft spot for that innocence. When those wide eyes are used for manipulation, it isn't quite as cute - not when it is recognized initially nor when years have passed and it is brought up in conversation how much planning went into the production of the scam (Proverbs 2:6-19 AMP).

In my place of employment, there are community computers to be used by the elderly residents in the building. The rule is when the grand children or any other family member comes to visit, the resident must accompany the visitor in order for the computer to be used by the visitor. Otherwise we would have anyone off the street come in and do as they pleased. One day, as I was closing the facility, there are usually a few still in the room, I have to announce that I am closing and when they can return the next day. Usually those people would be one or two of the residents. This time however, it was one of the grandchildren with two of his uncles (supposedly). The resident was no where in sight. I asked  the child it was time to leave and reminded him of the rules not having seen those two grown men before - ever. He said that he was trying to teach them how to use to the computer and quickly came up to me so I wouldn't see what they were doing. I wasn't paying too much attention to the child only noticing how the grown men were not listening to me. I came into the room further and the young boy looking to be about 11, talks a little louder repeating himself. I stop ignoring the child because I realize that he had a purpose in distracting me. I look at him as he made his eyes unusually wide and poked his bottom lip out. I almost choked trying not to laugh at his feeble attempts at being cute and innocent. "Get up out of here!" I said with a slight inflection in my voice. It let the child know I wasn't falling for it, and it also caused the "uncles" to immediately stop what they were doing. They saw my expression and could hear their nephew lost the ability with me.

The same wide eyed game is played in dating whether it be a female using her wiles to get the man to think that she is in need of rescuing or a guy who hasn't had sex in so long, his testicles are about to turn blue. As Christians, we are always looking for a way to help the other person in need of whatever it is (Proverbs 3:27 AMP). Don't let that assistance cost you something that cannot be redeemed. By that I mean, getting your heart all involved in the matter (Proverbs 4:23 NIV).

There is an elderly single woman residing at my place of employment. I will call her Patricia. Patricia made it a point to tell her friends that she is interested in getting a husband. Many of the men heard and there wasn't a barrage of them running towards her. In fact, more of them were trying to get away from her range of view. Patricia spotted one gentleman who was relatively new. She made her intentions known. He tried to be as polite as he could be and let the other residents that he dines with tell her that he is not interested in obtaining a relationship much less a wife. They told her to stop chasing him. Eventually she did and he was allowed to dine in peace. We then got another new resident that was very sociable and liked meeting new people. The first evening in the dining room he looked around and was a little disappointed that no one came and sat with him to make friends. The second night he had more of an amicable response. He got to know some of his neighbors and they him. By the third night, before retiring for the evening, he got use to the crowd and even gave Patricia and little back rub before saying his good nights. One of the couples came to me and said that Patricia finally got her man. They described how he rubbed Patricia's shoulders and how he made it a point to tell her specifically to have a good night. She was elated. Before he came, she was getting her hair done now and again. Now she made sure to tell me that she had to have her hair done a certain kind of way and she painted her own nails. She uses lipstick and takes the time to wear a dress as opposed to the sweats she initially wore for weeks on end. She smiled when he came in the room and he sat with the his usual dining companions which happened to include her same friends as well.

I was so pleased for the both of them, until I was told that this man said to a resident, that he was not interested. He was only being friendly and didn't mean to lead Patricia to think anything more then that. He said he was afraid  to come to dinner because she keeps chasing after him. I told the person to stop saying these things to me and had to see the matter for myself. All of my co-workers heard the same information but the residents didn't know this. I watched as the same resident came and continued to have meals with the same crowd including Patricia. As my co-worker would make fun of the matter with Patricia being so desperate, I had to dilute their entertainment to remind them of their age. That man being in his late 70's knew exactly what he was doing by rubbing Patricia's shoulders. You don't get that old and not know how to get a woman interested. He knew that she was looking for a man and at this point in her life was willing to do what ever it took to get him... including, you know what. My co-workers were quiet for a moment. It didn't seem all that cute and innocent anymore. I sort of didn't mean to squash their fun, but it was making me angry that a woman, even at her age, was going to be taken advantage of.

That same man smiles and still claims to be friendly. I have never seen him rub anyone else's shoulders. I asked the question, with as many widows as there are here that still have their wedding rings on, why didn't he chose one of them to be friendly with and rub on their shoulders? Its just innocent fun whether they are married or not - right?

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