Making It Plain

It is normal to ask a man, if he hasn't already told you, what it was that attracted him to you. Some might speak in a riddle thinking he is cute, a poem, or directly. Whichever the way he chooses, the intention is still the same: flattery and distraction. Now let that settle for a moment, knowing who you are in Christ. First, this is for the ladies, though the guys are welcome to continue on reading. Second, I know this is going to mess up many of men and the rap they have been using for years; nevertheless, if you continue to read this, you will realize how much sense it makes and why neither you or him has been getting anywhere with your relationship. Flattery is what we all like to hear and while they are talking, depending on whether you are mature enough, we look into their eyes and for mannerisms to see if the guy with all of his lovely language is being sincere or is his plan less then honorable ( Matthew 7:17-19 AMP ). Distraction takes the focus off of the good inten...

There are some things you would think is obvious not to do ( Exodus 22:19 AMP ). What I forget about is that there is a new generation that has sprouted out from being children into adulthood and have been taught from a media and social network that just weren't there when I was growing up. So some of the things I write, I direct towards them. Everything isn't common sense anymore and some have to pick up the rudimentary basics to realize the do's and don't in Christian dating have been written for our own good . For instance, it has been told and some older men will let the young girls know today, if you advertise your body by wearing scantily clad clothes, or taking pictures and posting them on social networks, you cannot be surprised with what sort of guy you get ( Galatians 6:7 AMP ). He will expect for you to put out the moment he sees you. Why? Because in his mind, he knows he was not the first to answer the advertisement. What ad? The picture you posted on Inst...

Do we as Christians know what that role is? The role of a woman. Has the clear definition been blurred by taking on so many other positions that her identity has no distinct path anymore? To hear certain pastors preach this role, you would think we never got it right - ever! From not wearing the right thing to keep our man to wearing the thing that attracts every other man. From being too strict with raising the children to not allowing for your children to be your friend. From having a career to assist with the income to being blamed for not being home more often. When does it end? When is it alright just to be the woman God created us to be? And then when we are happy with the skin we are in, we start dating and out of nowhere he says, he wants 12 children and that wasn't in your plans. Or he likes big butts and yours don't have enough junk. Or he likes for your hair to be natural and you have a perm. Or he would rather live in some third world country and you like the peac...

Writing in these blogs have been therapeutic . As things happen and I react to them (or not), I tend to replay the matter later in my mind thinking whether I could have done or said it in a better way. If so, I write about it. Suffice to state, I have done a lot of writing! Recently, I was thinking about Christians and the things that some have have written as we wait or prepare for the Lord ( Matthew 25:1-13 AMP ). Well, it is what we are supposed to be doing as singles. Yet, instead I read things like: " I am tired of the dating scene. If Mr. Right comes along, he'll have to find me." And the reply to that comment was, "you can't just stay at home. You can't quit. You have to get out there so he can find you." Then the other conceded her comment and agreed with the reply. You'd think that response is exclusive to women? You would be mistaken. Another Christian site that was launched April of this year, began by posting attractive picture...

The last entry of this blog had the definition of Oakie-Doke and all it entails. Please have a quick read to understand completely what the reference means. Recently, I was thinking about that verse with Abraham when he was leaving his parents' home and venturing forth with the direction of God at the helm, only Lot, his nephew, never got the memo and he came along as well ( Genesis 12:1-5 AMP ). The thought that was troubling was if Lot was married when he decided to leave with his uncle. The Word doesn't tell that he had anyone with him but it does clearly define that Lot had a family when leaving Sodom and Gomorrah. Or did the Word make those clarifications because of where the hearts of his family would rather have been ( Genesis 19:1-16 AMP )? The Word tells us to guard our hearts for out of them come the issue of life ( Proverbs 4:23 AMP ). We have the understanding when dating that we should be open and honest with the one we hope to be our intended. We tell of our c...

Any type of move is a transition of not only body but mind and spirit. It takes planning and organization for this to happen successfully. Moving without all aspects in place leaves room for confusion , chaos, and anxiety . We already know, that's not of God. The Word tells us to write the vision down and make it plain. This sounds like a directive, instruction, and a rule to live by. Only a fool would disregard it ( Proverbs 1:7 KJV ). What is "Oakie-Doke"? "Oakie-Doke" is a place where you were raised as a child. It can be a place that your parents started off with a young family because it is all they could afford at the time. It is a place where one would call a "comfort zone" and won't take a step for fear rather then for growth. Whether it is your mama's basement or an oppressive place of employment - it could very well be your obstacle impeding you from obtaining the blessings of the Lord. For Abraham, it was his family's home. God...

Happy New Year to all of my readers, those that catch a peep now and again, and to you first timers. This is the time where we make assessments over our lives and ask certain questions of ourselves or to God as to why a thing is still the way it is or how much longer do I need to wait for this thing. Well, a pastor defined insanity as doing the same things continually and expecting different results. Each year we make these enormous declarations that this is the year that we are going to meet Mr. Right or this is the year you will meet your good thing. Its just time and you are so tired of waiting... or so you think. In making these declarations at the beginning of the year, the world calls them New Year's resolutions. These resolutions are supposedly giving the declarer some direction in moving toward a specific goal. Some people actually get to the goal while others peter off within a few weeks of the new year. I know when I do such a thing it usually has to do with weight issu...

It is the end of the year and most of us would make an account of what we have done in the last of these 365 days. We will smile at some of it and maybe some of  those other things... well, its best we not think of them anymore ( Philippians 4:8 KJV ). You know, the stuff that we wish we should have said, should have done, could have done, if it were only for not having this or that. Those are called regrets. For a practicing born again believer, there is no place for any regrets. We have to see them as lessons that will not be repeated. The experience has taught us that given the same opportunity, we will react differently. Emotion will take a back seat to Christian principles , love , and wisdom . These are the things we have practiced to the point of them being habits. This is what we renewed our minds for. Honestly, having that understanding is half the battle in that spiritual warfare we call the evil nature. Its what used to be our rationality basing on what we see , rat...

I think it was one of the games I least liked playing when I was a child. The boys never wanted to play it and so the girls in the neighborhood had to be the man in the family too. It seemed so silly and I suppose we all felt a little weird in playing the role by which we truly had no clue... not even in pretending how to be something that none of us had a desire to be -men. Of all of the games we played, house didn't seem too long to get started and be over with just as quick. Lately, I've been watching a lot of reality shows and court t.v. where Judge Judy Sheinlin says that people in making asinine mistakes and playing house without the benefit of marriage keeps her in business. Though she seems annoyed at having to resolve the mess of others, she says she has been doing it for the past 16 years. Joint accounts, mortgages, taking a break from one another, having a protection order out for one but a week or two later he is welcome to the shared bed, dating and then...