Fragile: Handle with Care?

 There is something that has been brushed under a rug and calling the room cleaned for so long. Let’s remove the rug and see exactly what’s  under there. It’s not going to be pretty so be ready to get your feelings hurt. It’s big girl panties time and broccoli really is good for you! Ready?

It is the older that must tell the younger what she needs to know in order to be successful, as it is written for the older woman to do (Titus 2: 3-5 AMP). It is also written in the Old Testament for the older generation to tell the new generation the mistakes of the forefathers so they would not repeat them (Ezekiel 18:19-20 AMP). This is wonderful advice, only if adhered to and understood. Also if the one giving the advice has good intentions and no malice in his/her heart. But how would you know? The One created him/her would.

Alright, moving on. Keep the aforementioned in the front of your mind, we will be returning to that. You see, and this might not just be me, but you as well or you've heard of it. I was told that as a girl to watch what I say to boys so not to hurt their feelings. Boys were not given the same advice. They were told to never hit a girl. Some might have learned about girls having feelings but it wasn’t the important thing.  Boys were raised to be tough and to pursue tasks that require strength. Boys were taught to get into sports to get used to being hit and not cry. Get up, shake it off, and get them back. While girls were playing with dolls and ovens getting ready to be mothers and manage a household, boys were playing with army men and climbing trees to keep that rough exterior so they could be disciplined to do what is expected of them-support the family (1 Peter 3:7 AMP).

As we continued to be obedient, during that time, we watched the wars continue between countries  and

policies being made that weren’t beneficial for everyone. The teens of the 60’s and 70’s began to not want what the adults wanted. Women didn’t want to stay at home and be subservient. Women began saying and doing whatever they wanted including being direct to men. No more egg shell walking because of their fragile egos. A man’s feelings weren’t as important to her as they had been. Corporate America and the economy as it had been were going to feel a change, a shaking, like it had never been shook before.

I was in a position at a senior community where I looked forward to hearing all sorts of stories and wisdom flow through the approximately 150 residents. Factoring in the crotchety ones that didn’t like people, the ones that couldn’t venture from their same circle of friends, the recluses, and those that liked gossiping, there were still a few that spoke when absolutely necessary. Those were the ones that held fast to wisdom. Unfortunately for me, they also held fast to their pearls and gave them to only those they could trust with them….yes, that is written too (Matthew 7:6 AMP). It was the things they didn't say when the once boys they had raised were coming to see their elderly parents as opposed to those that never did. The elderly men that treated their daughters like ladies and the sons that kissed their fathers without shame. The real relationships spoke volumes.

So in the church, where is the disconnect? Men were created first, right? When hearing a sermon of correction due to disobedience, the subject matter of the sermon is usually focused on women. Looking for the balance to happen where the men need to hear about their short-comings too, it doesn't happen. The expectation becomes less and less until it is non-existent. Why, is what I asked a wife of a pastor. It was like she knew I was coming. She answered, "because if the pastor redirected the behavior of the men, the few that attend services would stop coming." Can you imagine the look on my face when hearing that answer? What does that mean? Are you expecting the women to take over because it is what the pastors have been creating. Can you see that? If you ever knew what to pray for, there it is. How can egos be so fragile when there is a spiritual war? The weapons of our warfare are mighty through the pulling down of strongholds (2 Corinthians 10: KJV). Where does a fragile ego fit in that scenario?

Here's a question, why are we as disciples of Christ, nurturing egos? Isn't an ego just another secular word for the flesh (Romans 8:8-17 AMP)? If so, won't the flesh still do what it is created to do (Galatians 5:16-24 AMP)? So again, I ask why? Also instead of the women asking pastors why, let the men that know better stand up and protect the weaker sex that God fashioned to be the help that men need. Its how iron sharpens iron that we may strengthen the body of Christ. Amen?