Friday, March 30, 2012

Casually Farting

A term that is more commonly known, to me, as flatulence is also a point in any relationship that kind of defines it. Pause and think about that (selah). If casually farting defines a relationship, it would be interesting what the feedback is without finishing the remainder of this entry.

Alright, how can the relationship be defined with passing gas? If a person has become so relaxed around the other that ripping one is acceptable, a discussion would also be on the agenda. Do you know enough about this person for him/her to inhale that foul odor stream in a gas from your hind quarters?
Sometimes it just slips out!

Does it or is it a means to force the relationship out of the impressing mode to a casual level? Will the lack of bathing and wearing sweat clothes all the live long day be next? If that's acceptable, why not have hairy arm pits and add bad breath too?

Fine, let's put the matter in the perspective of the Word by which this entire blog is founded. I recently wrote an entry entitled "Got Manners?" If you haven't already read it - start there and then work back this way.

God tells us to give thanks always (2 Thessalonians 1:3 AMP). This is proof that having manners factors into the 9 fruits of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23 AMP). Now incorporate those 9 fruits with the Love you have been practicing since - forever (Ephesians 5:2 AMP). Why get casual now? Casual almost seems like resurrecting the flesh (Galatians 5:16-21 AMP). Casually passing gas as if you don't care of the discomfort you are causing the one you profess all of that Love to.

Going full spectrum nonetheless; I realize there are those that see this topic as being no big deal. I have heard people talk about this and even going to the bathroom (#2) while the other is brushing his/her teeth or taking a shower. If it becomes a point of discussion, the one doing the casual acts will invariably say, "we are married, why are you making a case of it?" If it is fine with you and your intended, let it be. If it has never been thought of - ask. My parents never passed gas around us when we were little. I believed it was something that only children did to assist in growth or something like taking naps. When a "blrrpt" came from one of them, it was a shock. And while us, as children would have belt out roars of laughter, we also knew that the person who just politely "blrrpt" had to be embarrassed. The room was quiet. We heard an appropriate, "excuse me" and that person would leave the room. Was that a rule? No, just respect for others.

Would that also be true for a married couple or would there be such a relaxed atmosphere that one wouldn't have to go through that sort of effort anymore? While some may think this is funny now, it isn't as much when there is one going through it and all of a sudden other people seem more appealing and become a temptation because of comparisons to what is waiting for them at home or will soon be home from work. While my parents may have been stodgy in how they treated one another to someone else, one of the things that stood out for me was that they said thank you, please and blessed each other when one sneezed. Granted, these manners were teaching us to be just as mannerable to each other and outside of the home but it also taught me to be that way with my spouse as well. I suppose it was refreshing when we were dating and when he saw that after some time together, I wasn't trying to impress him. It was just a habit.

There are those that would say that he would like for his intended to be his best friend - like one of the guys. Even the reminiscing about one of the neighborhood girls that use to run with him and the guys in the hood wasn't like any other girl he has ever met. Just the idea of having fun with her again would cause him to look off in the distance and be with her again. Don't be fooled. He might reminisce about his childhood with a glazed look in his eye, but it is not to have a long term relationship with a woman that reminds him of one of the guys.

Just think about it before allowing the relationship to take a turn where you would rather not go. If your siblings had such contests as with passing gas or belching or making arm pit noises - you can laugh about that and move on. Those are your siblings that you will converse with, go to the movies, have cookouts and family gatherings. But it just is not the same with a spouse. He/she is not your sibling and never will be. There is a closeness and an intimacy that is much more then what you have with a parent. Much more then what you have with a friend and even more then a sibling. Don't minimize the specialisms of the relationship with the simple disregard of common courtesy. To paint a picture: its like wearing gym shoes to a formal wedding, wearing opera glasses to a tailgate party, expecting a butler to turn down your bed at some seedy motel - its just not done.

Remember to appreciate one another. The best way to do this is by reverencing him and for him to love her as Christ loved the church. Amen?   

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