Friday, June 8, 2012

The NFL, NBA, PGA, NHL, and Soon to Send An APB

It is not something that is thoroughly discussed because a new couple never factors in hobbies and other interests as being a problem in a marriage. Nevertheless, when a man gets to be an enthusiast in a sport that he will never play in but keeps scores of all of his favorite players, ladies need to realize that this seemingly innocent interest could become the mistress that no woman counts on.

He will spend every weekend with her and some week days. He will eat with her and laugh in a manner that he will never have with you. He will share her with his other friends and when she isn't there, it is all he and his friends can talk about until she returns again. And just when you think the season is over and you have at least 4 months to be with your new boyfriend, fiance, or husband without interruption, it is time for a new season of a different sport. Its like he turned in the blonde for a redhead. He will try to pacify you with some kind words and a bauble or two, but you know all he is doing is thinking about her (football, basket ball, hockey, golf, baseball, boxing, curling, soccer, race car driving, fishing, bowling, or whatever else is out there distracting the time that should be for you).

What is your alternative? You say you love him and God would not have you to be miserable. You know the blessing of the Lord makes you rich and he adds no sorrow with it (Proverbs 10:22 AMP). So can you see your self being ignored during these seasons for the rest of your life? What doesn't bother you now, will it be bothersome 10, 20, 30 years from now? Would you be his help or his thorn as you begin to nag him about watching too much sports (Proverbs 14:1 AMP)? Do you think you could get involved in what interests him? Would he be willing to teach you why he likes it so much so you can like it too?

Understand that I did that. Be ready for what happened to me. I tried to get into football but the helmets kept me from seeing the faces and all of the uniforms started to look the same. I didn't understand why the formation would begin and then one person moved and ran the width of the field just before the last number was called. Why didn't he start there in the first place? And those numbers, what were they? Why did the guy calling the numbers had to have his hands in the crotch of the player with the football? I guess I had too many question to really get involved with that sport and soon after the first couple of plays, I lost interest.

Then there was basketball. I started watching certain teams in the mid-late 80's. I asked questions and remembered the faces. I was immediately drawn to Clyde "The Glide" Drexler, Robert Parish, Larry Bird, Charles Barkley, Spud Mackenzie, Shaquille O'Neal, Rick Mahorn, Earvin "Magic" Johnson, and my all time favorite player, to this day.... Michael Jordan. I was sitting in my living room and cheering on teams like I was a guy who had been watching basketball for years. I remember seeing Michael Jordan leap over players to drop the ball in a basket that was underneath him! UNDERNEATH HIM! Those kinds of shots were played over and over again from different angles, from the faces of those in shock seeing it in person, from the commentator's perspective, highlights in the after show.... incredible is the only way to describe the way he played the game! Michael seemed as though he stepped up on a ladder that only he could see. It was amazing! I got it! I understood the fascination...the strategy in playing the game...the excitement...why the players are paid so much and why the coaches get so riled up when the game begins. I was riled up too! I recall running into the house from church services just to see the last minutes of a play off game. Detroit won against the Lakers that season. It was a game that had to be seen in person...so phenomenal!

Then, tragedy struck the Jordan family. His father was murdered. His father was the one that taught Michael the love of the sport but once Michael's inspiration was gone so was the miraculous moves that made Michael, "Air" Jordan. He tried his hand at baseball, but it wasn't the same. He returned to basketball for a short while but when he retired (for the last time), the game lost its flavor for me. I didn't know how anyone else could watch it anymore. Even if he was a commentator for awhile, it would ease the discomfort of not seeing him play, but he didn't do that either. I became bored with the game as my favorite players also retired or was traded to other teams that weren't televised.

I learned a lesson about the sport as well as my tolerance of those who have the need to watch such games. If you would like for your child to be focused with anything, allow his father to be involved in his/her life (Proverbs 15:20 AMP). It makes a humongous difference (Proverbs 19:13 AMP). That's to all of the divorced single parents asking God for a new mate (Proverbs 17:25 AMP). You have your answer as to why it could be taking so long. But back to the mistress in the house.... could you see yourself getting into any of those games that seem to consume all of his free time? What if this is the way he relaxes? And to the guy, when you wish to be affectionate and she doesn't have time for you, can you really be upset seeing you spent so much time with your other (Proverbs 29:3 KJV)?

A well known tele-evangelist, speaks about  the time she had to come to grips with her husband's passion for the sports on television and his own hand in golf. When she wished to spend time with him, according to her, he was right in the middle of a game and wished to finish what he started. I never heard of her retaliation when he was ready for her after the game was over. She never said that she denied him because of her anger, but she didn't say she was at all loving and forgiving either (1 Corinthians 7:4 KJV). Would you be, ladies? Could you understand, guys if she were upset?

Its just something that is not readily discussed when dating. Its a subject that wouldn't seem to be an issue. Trust, that it is, especially when children are involved and there is only one expected to do everything. Priorities previously discussed can be moved aside when a game goes into overtime, a playoff season, or the Dream Team in the Olympics.

There was a young woman in her early 20's.  She was dating a young man interested in her for marriage. They made arrangements on the weekend seeing that she was a career woman on the week days. The young man forgot the game was playing on the day they were suppose to be going out. He came over a little early as she was still getting ready. He asked to turn on the television while he was waiting. She didn't have a problem with that. She heard the announcer and knew it was basketball season (or maybe football - who cares?) Anyway, she only took a few minutes and returned to the family room expecting him to comment on the way she looked. He was so into the game he didn't know she came into the room. When she cleared her throat to get his attention, he said, "just a minute, okay...its the last few minutes of the game. See, its only 2 minutes left." Disappointed that he didn't notice her new outfit she sat down to wait for the game to be over. The game went into overtime and because she didn't watch what was going on, he had switched the channel to another game and hoped she wouldn't notice. How could she not notice 3 hours later? She asked him to leave. Where could they possibly go to change the disposition he caused when coming to her house to see the game? How could he try to convince her that she is more important when he brought the mistress to her house and will do it again - because he has the love of the game? Would he ever put her off in the dating process because "his mistress" will have 3 shows on 3 different channels at the same time?

Its something men have to be watchful for within themselves and for women to see if there is "a mistress" lurking about. She might not be the curvaceous vixen that most women would suspect; nevertheless, she still has the power to cause priorities to be misappropriated. If he still places God first, then all is well (Proverbs 3:6 KJV). If substitutes are put in place instead of going to church and excuses are made - run. The love of the game has been magnified (Psalm 70:4 KJV).


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