A Messy Life, A Messy Wife

Well, what did you expect was going to happen? Do you really think when you get married that she is going to clean up all of your crap for you? Did you really think that's what God meant when He created a help for you? Really? Who taught you that foolishness? Before you even try to form the word, God, think about what you are about to say. The all knowing, all powerful God, loved you so much that He created a woman to be your own personal slave? So He loved you more then He loves her? What sort of god do you serve?

Seriously, where do you think women's lib came from? Idiotic thinking from the man. He didn't value his wife, thought he could do whatever he wished whenever he wished, and didn't care for the good thing he had at home. Where was she going to go? She didn't have an education (Hosea 4:6 KJV). She was working menial jobs for her husband to go through school. When he was finished, he didn't think it necessary for her to go to school and have a career. He said he would be taking care of her and she believed him. Only now with an education, and having a better income, he doesn't see the sacrifice she made for him (2 Timothy 3 KJV). He sees a new circle of people he never knew existed. His education and skills placed him a new environment. There are people that understand him and his vision because theirs is the same (Proverbs 18:16 KJV). They can relate to him. There are women there too. Its fascinating, enticing, and tempting to be drawn to those women. What about the wife at home? Now this same woman he spoke his undying love to while dating doesn't understand him anymore in his new world, but he has some sort of obligation because of all she did for him to get him where he is...oh, and she is caring for his children that he couldn't afford if it wasn't for her. Eventually, she senses him being distant. Though she's scared to ask, she has to. In so doing, she finds that she has no place in his heart. He moves on without having to pay any alimony or child support. The courts didn't have laws in place like that as they do now (1 Timothy 5:8 KJV). Women's Liberation began its roots from such the scenario.

Inconsiderate and thoughtless men, even claiming to be Christian has made this world what it is today. There is no one else to blame. What's worse is not taking the time to tell the next generation to keep it in his pants until certain matters are in place so not to destroy his life and the daughter of someone who had the best intentions for your son.

When I was dating, way back when, I saw how I pleased most of the parents who I was introduced to. The guys couldn't wait for me to meet Mom and Dad. I sat with them, held my own in conversation, know what utensils to eat with, and when it was time for me to leave, I could see the reaction of the parents with their sons. The parents didn't see their reflection in the mirror or a curio cabinet as I turned towards the door and saw them praising their son. Its funny, that the parents never divulged with me the behavior of their sons before meeting me. They never told me that their son had a wild life way back when and is now finally ready to settle down. They never gave me the heads up about his drug or alcohol use, how many times he had been in trouble with the police, or if he ever had a habit of going to strip clubs. No, it was more important if I ever did such things. Questions came flying at me during dinner. Why? Wasn't it as important for the man to be clean, faithful, without any signs of temptation in going back out in the street? How is a clean, upright, faithful woman supposed to take on the challenge of changing a man that the parents didn't control or raise properly? When she has children, is she supposed to raise her child and her husband too? Why wouldn't parents be empathetic at such the plight - no matter if its their son or someone else's daughter? Why be so uncaring and thoughtless not to wish the best for someone else's child as well?

My co-worker asked me an interesting question and is fitting for this entry. He actually said, with all sincerity having heard the implication before but without a satisfactory answer. He asked, "why is it always the man's fault?" Interesting as it was for me to use all of the Word I had to blast him, I had to recall the 3rd chapter of Genesis when God was looking for Adam and asked, "where are you?" Adam had changed from what God created him to be. When Adam answered God with what he had done, his reply was to blame the woman that was given to him. Adam wasn't just blaming his help but God for giving her to him. If Adam took the responsibility of not tending to the garden as God told him to do originally, I believe the fall of man would not have happened as it is written now. My co-worker in asking such the question, had an answer at the ready. I could see it in his eyes that he has asked and answered this question. He claimed to believe that there is a God but to what extent is his faith. I treaded lightly having my scriptural arsenal at the ready.

I told my co-worker that the blame belongs to man because he was created first. He is the head of his house and dictates what is supposed to be done in it. If he has allowed for his wife to manage his house then he is the one that makes sure it is all that he expects for it to be. It is the reason that he proposes to her and not the other way around. He was made first!

When God came to see what was done with what He gave to Adam, God did not ask the woman about her house. He asked Adam. Notice that when Adam was presented  his wife, he didn't name her as he had with everything else. Naming things brought to Adam is what Adam was called to do. This is a lesson to all men. If you cannot diligently perform the job that has been given you, you cannot expect to be given the best of the best (Hebrews 11:6 KJV). You are not at your best!

The woman was formed from Adam's rib. All the DNA that was in and on that rib became a part of that woman. Would that also mean spiritually? If Adam didn't pay attention to continue to do what God told him to do, is it a surprise that the woman didn't take heed not to eat of the tree? How is it that she could hear the voice of the serpent and not the voice of the man she was created to help? Adam was standing right there! Why didn't he speak? Why didn't he rebuke or remove the serpent from the garden? Adam was given dominion over all that creep and crawls the earth (Genesis 1:26 KJV). How could there be an identity crisis without oppositional influence?

Originally, I was going to write a list for men to get their act together before embarking on the assignment of going to find a wife. But it would have all been just that - an act. You, as a man have to go before God and make for certain that you are doing all that He has called you to do. He is a good God and loves His daughters just as much as He loves you (Matthew 5:45 KJV). He will give you the sum total equivalence of who you are. If you ever think it is her fault for anything that has happened - in the past, present, and future...seriously, look in the mirror.