Presumption and Assumption Don’t Take the Place of Faith

 

This blog grew from an idea for a book that was being mulled around after attending a number of Christian Single conventions and seeing the wonderful ideas people had for Christians to meet one another. It was all so exciting and interesting, at first. But then, there I was in the public library because I wasn’t able to afford a computer of my own yet, and a woman saw the title of that book that I was mulling around for Christian singles. She asked if I would have a chapter on cohabitating. I stared at the title because I didn’t know what to say. Why ask something that had nothing to do with the title of the book? Did she not understand? It’s for Christian singles. There is no cohabitating when your focus is on God. There is no shacking up and calling it common law marriage. There is no oops and making your faux pas seem alright because God sees your heart and real intentions. What was she asking of me? Am I supposed to compromise what I believe the book should be about because someone else was loose on their principles? I was surprised and frustrated. I had already made the assumption that we, as believers were already on the same page. Like it or not, the purpose of the written information was to help strengthen the body of Christ. After meditation, I had to get over myself and be about my Father's business. The truth of the matter is, if there was a lack of understanding within the body, then that’s where the focus must be in order us all to function optimally and be strengthened (Proverbs 27:17 AMP).

That assumption is the purpose for this entry. We attend services when the church is open for spiritual sustenance; however, we give little thought, unless volunteering, what everyone else is coming to church for. Oddly, there are a myriad of reasons that aren’t usually brought up in the sermons because the pastor has an agenda and the minds of those he is shepherding is not upper most. Nevertheless, from getting a spouse (male or female) to feeling clean for the rest of the week and everything in between from having a weekly church routine to having nothing else better to do, people don’t attend church services for the reasons it has been made available to us. The Word tells the believer to forsake not the assembly of the saints (Hebrews 10:25 AMP). When we meditate on that verse, clearly as a believer you can understand the importance of why we come together. But for those that are still assuming that someone else will make it known to you, the purpose is for iron to sharpen iron. Plain and simple.

Parents, when raising their children accept the responsibility of making sure there is an understanding for them to get along with others, to problem solve without consequence when you can and above all else, do everything with God in mind (Proverbs 3:6 AMP). Parents bring their children to church believing that when those precious souls come to Sunday school, the assigned teacher has basically those same ideals and is reinforcing what the parents try to drive into their children at every free moment. The purpose is for them to not only survive but thrive in the admonition of the Lord. Issues come when the simple building blocks aren’t placed on a sure foundation. Relationships at home crumble and there is only a one parent household overwhelmed by doing it all. But that’s okay because the public school system is still in the business of teaching your children reading, writing, and arithmetic. Outside of anything else is notified for the parent to correct the child because it is the intentions of the school (and the parent) that the child to be a well rounded uniquely gifted individual -right?

When Christians decide to date, it isn’t considered something to do out of boredom. It is a conscious decision knowing that you have graduated from your previous position and have accepted the promotion. You have accepted the duties of ministry. It’s not just guilt free sex with spooning afterward. It is what you were practicing before and multiplying it by 10. What do you think 1 will put a thousand to flight, 2 will put ten thousand means? Women were created to help men. Think about that concept for a moment. Men, being stronger than a woman and continuing as heads of state yet, still needing help and it was not man's answer to provide him with a woman. It was God’s solution to the problem (Genesis 2:18 AMP). How do you think this simple concept became so contrive to where it is today? 

A young Christian woman accepted a date from a young man professing to be a Christian. His whole family were raised under Christian principles. With his father a CEO of a company and his mother a real estate broker, the woman thought that the apple couldn't fall too far from the tree. As they continued to see each other on a regular basis, the woman was aware that she gave this man allowances that she would not dare anyone else simply because him being a Christian and being raised around a well established family. She found herself appeasing arguments that otherwise she'd called groundless. Nevertheless, she believed all of her efforts were considered an investment and would eventually double her return. Once vows were exchanged, the pretense became a thing of the past. The well to do mother had lost her real estate license years ago because of  loss of interest to renew. The father offered his son a job within the company but the son wasn't interested in business nor did he like people telling him what to do. The Christian principles the young woman believed her fiancé, now husband, was basing his life on was as fluid as his excuses were to not obtain gainful employment. How could something seemingly so perfect go so wrong?

Potential is a word derived from presumption. It would seem with such an upbringing that he/she has the potential to be a good provider, an excellent mother, the perfect lawyer, doctor, therapist, or whatever. The point is, without that due diligence (the work), potential is just a 3 syllable fancy word that means nothing. This diligence is with everything. With your children, it is not safe to assume that the teacher has yours or your child's best interest to heart. Everybody has their own agenda, a bad day, their own issues outside of the job. Do they have the skills to separate those feelings? Will they? Can you take that gamble? Of course this is true in dating. If you have been set up because he/she or even you have been single too long (says who?). The person setting you up thinks that you and the other is perfectly matched (based on what?). Do you take their word for it or do you go through your check list? Can you throw the dice and think its going to be alright?

As a young woman, I used to be completely satisfied with potential because I believed eventually what I was hoping for or what was planned will be worked out to the fullest extent. But if there has been no history of that being done before, what is the hope based on? Hearing all of the excuses for not implementing the well thought out plan, it doesn't take long before you see that wonderful potential turn into procrastination. Arguing comes after and if you are not the arguing kind, the entertained thought of wishing you never met him/her is being formed into words about to escape from your mouth. Resentful, angry words that you will eventually have to ask God forgiveness in saying them.

Even if you think you are doing right because you took the advice of someone else, what does God say about the matter? Did you acknowledge Him? It is  IMPOSSIBLE to please Him without faith (Hebrews 11:6 AMP). When did you put your faith to the test? If you asked him/or her to allow for sometime apart (before marriage) for you to think clearly, will that person allow for that separation to happen? Will there be an urgency for a serious discussion because he/she doesn't understand why the 2 of you can't work out the problem together. It will be good practice he/she says because they could not have you be without him/her for you to think on your own? If this is what comes forth with your simple request, you have your answer. See the flags flying?